Making A Baby – Very Funny

Teka medyo hinga muna tayo ng malalim at masyado tayong seryoso ng mga ilang araw. Isang masayang  istorya po ito galing sa aking email kanina.

baby1

Making a baby. This is hilarious!

There is not one dirty word in it, and it is funny!–

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to
use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the
proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife
goodbye and said, ‘Well, I’m off now. The man should
be here soon.’

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby
photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a
sale. ‘Good morning, Ma’am’, he said,
‘I’ve come to…’

‘Oh, no need to explain,’ Mrs. Smith cut in,
embarrassed, ‘I’ve been expecting you.’

‘Have you really?’ said the photographer.
‘Well, that’s good. Did you know babies are my
specialty?’

‘Well that’s what my husband and I had hoped.
Please come in and have a seat !.

After a moment she asked, blushing, ‘Well, where do we
start?’

‘Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the
bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed.
spread out there.’

‘Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn’t
work our for Harry and me!”

‘Well, Ma’am, none of us can guarantee a good one
every time.. But if we try several different positions and I
shoot from six or seven angles, I’m sure you’ll be
pleased with the results.’

‘My, that’s a lot!’, gasped Mrs. Smith.

‘Ma’am, in my line of work a man has to take his
time. I’d love to be In and out in five minutes, but
I’m sure you’d be disappointed with that.’

baby2

‘Don’t I know it,’ said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a
portfolio of his baby pictures. ‘This was done on the
top of a bus,’ he said.

‘Oh, my God!’ Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her
throat.

‘And these twins turned out exceptionally well – when
you consider their mother was so difficult to work

‘She was difficult?’ asked Mrs. Smith.

‘Yes, I’m afraid so. I finally had to take her to
the park to get the job done right. People were crowding
around four and five deep to get a good look’

baby3

‘Four and five deep?’ said Mrs. Smith, her eyes
wide with amazement.

‘Yes’, the photographer replied. ‘And for more
than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing
and yelling – I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness
approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the
squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack
it all in.’

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. ‘Do you mean they actually
chewed on your, uh….equipment?’

‘It’s true, Ma’am, yes.. Well, if you’re
ready, I’ll set-up my tripod and we can get to work
right away.’

Tripod?

‘Oh yes, Ma’am. I need to use a tripod to rest my
Canon on. It’s much too big to be held in the hand very
long.’

Mrs. Smith fainted.

Ano bang moral lesson mga kaibigan?

– – – – – – – – – – –

Someday gusto ko ring maging baby photographer.

—-Baby Pictures courtesy of  allbabypics.com.

18 comments on “Making A Baby – Very Funny

  1. alkapon says:

    ako rin gusto rin maging photographer ng bata.. tapos gusto ko rin kunan yung nilalabasan ng bata.. he he he

    minsan kasi pag hindi mo ma getz, iba ang nasa isip, me halong grin.. lalo na yung green minded. he he he

    hilarious story, i like it.

    • Haha…beys ka Al….ihahanap kita ng customer sa gusto mong potograpiya. buti na lang di tayo green minded Al…hehe. May maniwala kaya.

      Ganyan talaga ang buhay…minsan saliwa ang pinag-uusapan na parang naakakatugma…..ummmm mabuti ng maingat sa mga pinag-uusapan…siguraduhin mabuti.

      Salamat sa pagbisita.

    • Pahabol…

      Teka Al…bigla kong naalala…bakit potograper ang gusto mo? ayaw mo ba ng maging ‘surrogate father’ na trabaho?..hehe joke lang po.

      Alam mo naalala ko ito sa aming bayan at puwede mong isulat itong topic na ito…iyong tungkol sa lalaking baboy na dala-dala(actually hila-hila na may tali) ng may-ari na umiikot sa bayan at nag-aalok ng bulog para sa mga inahing baboy. Ang sigaw nung lalaking may ari ay ganito…”Bulog kayo riyan”…hehe nakakatawa kasi kung green-minded ka talaga ay parang iyong may ari ang nag-aalok ng bulog. Malaki rin ang bayad sa ganitong trabaho sa amin.

      Parang pinaganda lang ang word…’surrogate father’…sosyal ano….hehe…pareho lang nung sa baboy…

  2. kaye says:

    haha! very funny indeed.🙂

    e kasi naman dapat nagtatanong kung sinong pinapapasok sa bahay para di nagkakamali ng paga-assume… hahahaha!

    nice one, tay!

    • Haha..oo Kaye…nakakatuwa na sa isang simpleng topic lang ay napaikot ang kuwento. Yung potograper na totoong trabaho lang niya ang sinasabi while si Mrs Smith ay nire-relate niya yung sinasabi sa gusto niyang isipin o mangyari….nakakatuwang istorya na parang puwedeng mangyari….tama don’t assume…hehe

      Salamat at ingat lagi dyan sa atin.

  3. Hahaha😀

    Napaswerto po yata ang timing ni Photographer ah? hehe..🙂

    NEVER ASSUME, ALWAYS CONFIRM! hehe.😀

    • Ayy Salamat Roneth…haha. Naalala ko ang mga Pinoy minsan ay ganyan…nakakatapos ng pag-uusap na ang ginagamit ay ANO….yung Ano…dun sa Ano…si Ano…..at yun nga kapag sumasablay na naito na ang sasabihin… Ay AKALA ko….hehe.

      Kaya mabuti na yung sigurado sa pinag-uusapan:

      NEVER ASSUME, ALWAYS CONFIRM!

  4. eli says:

    haha..nakakatuwa naman..akala ko kung ano na yun.hehe..

    • Haha…medyo maiba-iba naman sandali ang kuwentuhan…relax lang ng konti kasi nagiging seryus na tayo….ang moral lesson nga daw ay ….NEVER ASSUME…may aral naman.

      salamat sa pagbisita

  5. hahahaha!!!!

    Parang gusto na rin tuloy magshift ng field sa photography ah,… hehehe…

    yan kasi, hindi muna nagtanong agad agad… hehehe….

    • Haha..oo minsan ganyan talaga ang tao Mark…na-shortcut…pinangungunahan ang istorya…hehe

      Pero good boy naman yung potograper…straight ika nga sa trabaho niya…kung di nahimatay si Msis ay baka nga mabago ang kanyang trabaho….hehe

      Haha…oo nga ano baka maka-meet ka rin ng ganito kung baby photographer ka pala….exciting…hehe

      Salamat pala sa pagbisita.

  6. J.Kulisap says:

    Si Alkapon, hari ng kalibugan itong batang ito.Wahehehe.

    Hindi ko maintindihan kung marunong magsex yong mag-asawa parang inosente si Misis eh.

    Unawaing maige, baka iba ang binibenta..baka iba ang inaalok. Magtanong para hindi mapahiya.

    Takam na takam ka na baka humupa pa.

    • Haha korek ka dyan JKulisap si Al ang gamot sa mga taong nanlalambot…hehe

      Ewan ko nga ba kung bakit ganyan ang usapan…kaya siguro naimbento ang salitang …..”Ang Akala ko”…ayun akala nga..ang ginagamit kapag sumablay na….Hehe tama yun mag-ingat bago mapunta pa sa usapan ang …”Akala ko kasi….”

      —-“Takam na takam ka na baka humupa pa.”

      gusto ko itong sinabi mo para kay Misis…ummmm tsarap tsarap sana.

  7. bongkito says:

    hi superlolongpinoy! sumilip lang po. anyways, the story is super duper hilarious! buti na lang si Mrs. Smith di agad nagtanggal ng damit nung sabihin yung areas where the “shots” were to be taken. kung hindi baka yung photographer ang nahimatay! nyahahah!

    pero sarap ng ganyang line of work. of course kung dito ka sa Pinas, medyo magbubuno ka talaga ng finances for the equipment, and knowledge of how to go about it. sana later, kami ni Kaye will have that kind of chance to make it as a business if ever we decide to really invest into it. well, darating yun, basta we’ll work hard for it!

    ingats na lang dyaN!

    • Haha…nakakatuwa nga ang twist ng istorya na ito. May aral din ito…na kailangan talaga wag mag ‘assume’ …hehe minsan gayan si Pinoy eh.

      Yap tama ka Bong…magandang bisnes at libangan pa ang Photography. Ako yata marami pang kakanin sa Photograpy…pero yung bunso ko mahilig…kaya asa na lang ako sa kanyang talent muna…medyo later siguro makapag-paturo rin ako sa anak ko.

      Sige Bong…Musta rin sa family dyan sa atin. Salamat.

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